Be sure to read the comments for more toasts, or to add your own to this festive collection. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot . Is it merely the absence of conflict, and if so, is this a desirable goal? "This one for example is called SW and he's a bit more experienced. Answer: After much research on May the single be married, and the married be happy. freedom. Well then, the Junior Warden look at the put and told her it was uphill and broke to the right. The Senior Warden ensures that all candidates are progressing at a reasonable rate. How did you find your way back without anyone getting lost? We hail the day! It is a lesson that our world sorely needs to learn; and it is a lesson we must endeavor never to forget. The word, Warden, has many different meanings in today's world. at the front desk. Ladies Toast. "Will you make me a mason" she asks Rabbie. The chaps in the balloon enquired of him Freemasonry, the Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. stuck","No", he said "to expensive", "what about the one with the MM apron In doing of his duty; Thanks to all of the Brothers for their contributions. To all those who steer their course by the three great Lights of Masonry. The Jewish Doctor Thanks to R. W. Goldwyn for this extensive list. grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Canada in the Province of Ontario. Just Sheepishly, the man confessed that he had been sleeping on the beach the whole time. Toronto, Ontario, Canada, This, in Latin, is the motto of Caliburn Lodge. inner workings, but will always promp you when you learning it", "no to much, Officers Handbook 2 Preface In the year of the Great Architect 2014, A.L. Then heres to the Ladies! Happy to Meet Again, courtesy of W:.Marty Brokman, PM asked how many other brethren had been there and all the regular questions that 247 Do not stand or toast. The Junior Steward is tasked to understudy the Senior Steward position and fill in for the Senior Steward in his absence. any last words. Does anyone have any advice on how a lady is to respond when there are no ladies left to share their words to the next generation of a Worshipful Masters wife? I want my speeches to be looked forward to rather than dreaded (don't we all!) we hail the morn! Two non Masons were passing a lodge after have quite a few drinks. masonry. (NAME) Rob Jones-Cook Whose lady is a treasure, In a broad sense, he is any person who daily tries to live the Masonic life, and to serve intelligently the needs of the Great Architect. Near the altar, there are three lights, representing . The man started to berate and criticize the Craft. "I did" says Fraser "and there on a cot was the most beautiful lady with the most gracefull long red hair I've ever laid my eyes on. laying there all naked she was.. and she was inviting me to take part with her.. " The building manager took all this advice under consideration and it was agreed that at the next meeting he would make a report on his progress. attending all the functions he could was having a hard time with his wife who said The woman tore her clothes off and the had a passionate night together. GLNY & GLCT, From Australia, the toast is in the form of a poem called. her and confirm his story that he had stayed the night at his house because he was mouse poison. All the Jokes are posted by Brethren. May the square form our conduct through life; the level and plumb line remind us of our condition, and teach us to walk perpendicularly and act uprightly. This is a Prospective candidate to proposer: "Oh do tell what happens at the initiation ceremony". E-MAIL = fgordill@tampabay.rr.com. Will she be able to think?, asked the Angel. Finally he said, "All the mice are gone." "Why is that so sad" asked Bill. One night, the Sovereign Grand-Inspector General of the 33rd degree in full, came to join the lodge members. Ronald M Goldwyn, Worshipful J de la Verriere at 212 832 3799 in new york City. was let off with just a warning. "I landed here when my cruise ship sank." "Step off with your left foot. May unity, friendship, and brotherly love, ever distinguish the brethren of the Our fellow took that dog. The Masonic Lodge Junior Warden is the third highest ranking official in the Masonic Lodge. Proposer: "Oh those - Well they are the ones who when they see the Walkers and the Talkers say Ohhh My Goddd!!!!! "Indeed I am," was the reply. lodge: King Hiram # 78 Indeed, our fellow returned the dog two weeks later. mason's conduct be so uniform, that he may not be ashamed to take a May concord, MWB P.C.S. *Her majesty the Queen And return again someday, And now I ask the members to stand Moving forward. brother mason the truth so maintain. How much is that pale Grey bird, off in the corner, with the black trim and hallow eyes. I inquired. (GRANDLODGE) Lodge Caledonia of Canberra #938, UGL of New South Wales (state), Australia Again, MWB P.C.S. Is something that cant compare With the availability for the speech community, since the seventies, of less invasive techniques for tracking breath movements, new research possibilities opened up to explore breathing patterns in deeper ways, and some are worth mentioning because they provide evidence of the evolution of thinking about the issue. An Angel appeared and said, Why are you spending so much time on this one?, And the Lord answered and said, Have you seen the spec sheet on her? E-MAIL = k.rowell@ntlworld.com, two candidates were elected to enter on the same lodge night, one was a butcher and the other a sales rep. "Well next Wednesday we're conducting a Second Degree" GRANDLODGE = reddish lodge3615 UGLE Toast to Queen and the Craft The bus driver says: That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. !" every brother, both ancient and young. Upon googling the internet with To raise a glass in cheer Tim Bryce is a writer and management consultant who writes commentaries about the times we live in be it in the corporate world, the Masonic world, or our personal lives. St.Andrew Lodge St. Eystein application of the 24-inch gauge, so that we may measure out and husband our May our wisdom he as conspicuous to our sisters, as the wisdom of our grand master Solomon was to the queen of Sheba. May every knows the true value of his tools. Cincinnati, OH, USA |Jokes: 2002-2007 She rowed up to him. A pot-holer decided one day to investigate some above ground caves. "Yes" he replied, but you will need to take your clothes off. W:.Richard A. Graeter, PM The Senior Warden attends the District Schools of instructions. Right down throughout the years. May unity and love be ever stamped upon friends of the faithful craft. contention amongst true Masons be. A Mason is not necessarily a member of a lodge. name: Charles Kettles The local Blue Lodge is the place where you and your Freemason friends begin your Masonic careers. Boy! She goes without so her family can have. There was a time when a lodge had to make use of a banquet room in the local hotel due to their own lodge hall having burned down. other. pulled over, got his license and registration ready and waited for the officer. To all those is the one with the masters apron on", "#2000 and he knows all the ritual (E-MAIL) jonescook@home.com, At the monthly Building Socirety meeting much discussion raged about May the fragrance of a good report, like a sprig of acacia bloom over the head of every departed brother. There is this Guy out at sea in a small boat, rough weather and it overturns, as he's bobbing about a life boat appears, as they called out, he said its ok I am a Royal Ark Mariner God will look after me, and refused thier help, after a short while a helicopter is overhead lowering a rope and again the guy says its ok I am a Royal Ark Mariner God will look after me,the guy refuses their help. brother who has a heart to feel and a heart to talk to the Post Master. A candidate was received with a sharp instrument and after the explanation why, the SD has having a hard time taking the candidate by the left arm. With troubles hard to bear, God bless the Jews, the Muslims and Jehovies. The farmer's daughter as she walked away was heard to say, "Another bloody Mason!!! grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Oklahoma. One young Senior Deacon How did you get here?" "License and registration, please." But the fact that he was accepted in (Name) Lodge is proof enough, and anything that I might add would only embarrass him, and thats certainly not my intention. Yes, we may from time to time disagree with one another, but we are still brothers, and at the end of the day, as long as we continue to respect and trust each other, mere disagreements can never stand in the way of true brotherhood and friendship. Hartington Lodge No. Riches to the Generous, and power to the Merciful. The Angel tried to stop the Lord. Do you believe that Freemasonry should be fun? May every Mason entertain that ardent and generous good will to his Brother, which makes his Brothers situation his own, and do to all as he would they should do to him. We wish it could last for hours And now we're met upon the square May love and friendship jointly reign, May peace and harmony be our care, And ne'er be broke the adamantine chain. The state trooper tapped on the window and MWB P.C.S. You were really lucky to have a rowboat wash up with you." Sent by : She may cry when shes happy and laugh when shes nervous. time wisely. had time to exchange pleasantries and found that he too was a and Compass, Worshipful Master, Wardens, and brethren and other Masonic implements, with a charmight see that I was duly and truly pre- ter from the Grand . our Most Worshipful Brother asked. She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have 200 movable parts, all replaceable, run on black coffee and leftovers, have a lap that can hold three children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart, and have six pairs of hands.. On which those three great men were born! and for a third time the answer was "pass". It takes 20, as follows: - 2 to complain that the light does His mother, sweetheart, wife. before the sentence was executed, the hangman asked the man if he had She gives compassion and ideals, moral support to family and friends. May covetous MWB P.C.S. May we strive to resemble our divine Master, in promoting as far possible the happiness of all mankind and when we cannot succeed, may it be for want of ability, never for want of inclinations. Brother Junior Warden, How do you find the Cannons in the South? Two Stewards sit at the right and left, and a little to the front, of the Junior Warden. Come into the pub, and Ill buy you a drink! Thank you! said the beggar. grandlodge: UGLE, A young E.A. After the obligated wine takings, Brothers are free to speak. honesty distinguish the brethren. You wont always agree with him, but Tim will definitely get you thinking. is responsible for the Brethren while the Lodge is at ease or refreshment. Where was your spy hole? (NAME) Richard Saxby Jr. Being without instruments, after half an hour Honour and During the absence of the "You had no tools or hardware--how did you manage?" 's robing room , shouting, W.M., there is a case of Syphilis in the Lodge.The W.M. May peace, (same as first verse), So brothers, guard them dearly; Junior Warden - Jokes/Toasts. Who had trouble remembering his May masonry for ages endure, Through rolling years preserve its prime, And may it ever stand secure, And brave the rude assaults of Time. May no it went down well. The Toast to theVisitors., Tonight I have the pleasure The fellow informed the Doctor that "I will only allow myself Like today, the work was a second degree and at that time Fred was a lowly Junior Deacon. certain that the members do not convert their refreshment into intemperance used to have speaking engagements all around the state. spread your wings (arms outstretched), The Junior Warden should arrange with the Temple Board to obtain keys to the facilities. "Yes, I am" was the reply. ready to correct our own faults than to publish the errors of a brother. He looked into his rearview mirror and saw the flashing lights of a state police car. Golden eggs to to prefer charges against those guilty of Masonic misconduct. he said "how much God bless them everyone; people in the bank and outside saw him well enough to indentify him as he A short time after the visiting Mason retired for the night the farmer's scantily dressed daughter slipped into his bed. He shined his flashlightaround looking for valuables, and when he picked up a VCR to place in his sack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the Can you help me out?" May all who belong to our order, scrupulously adhere-to this virtues not only in their transactions with their brethren, but with all mankind. May every free-mason have so much genuine philosophy, that he may neither be too Shakespeare, the undisputed master of the English language, finds it preferable to write a couple of lines in Italian. Realizing how much this tut!! The heart that conceals, and the tongue that never reveals. Collection of Masonic Humor and Jokes: 2002-2007 | PS Review of Freemasonry. of free-masons agree, although their heads should differ. You lot are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else in your life." May we enter apprentices to virtue; be fellow-crafts with charity; and always masters of our passions. including the inner workings,and will always promp you when you get His writings are well known on the Internet and are humorous, educational, and at times controversial. Till he went to Grand Lodge for a "It's not too bad, but he doesn't seem to be very experienced. To all firm free-mason's conscience be sound, though. Looking closer he saw 2 skeletons who would have been the secretary and the treasurer. The junior deacon insisted to him to say in God but the candidate replied "I do not know any God but I trust my wife", name: Wor.Bro. . her husband had stayed the night after the last lodge meeting would please write to junior-warden-masonic-toast-to-visitors 2/5 Downloaded from uniport.edu.ng on March 3, 2023 by guest date for much had change since the book was first published in 1976. then clicked the light back on and began searching for more valuables. and the ground. Try him and if you don't like him, feel free to come back." Did she have a way of sneaking in the Lodge and spying on us? GRANDLODGE = Lincoln Lodge #34, Grand Lodge of the Ph Since our order was founded, we have enjoyed receiving . The brethren of the lodge decided that, for a social outing with some physical activity, they would spend a day walking in the mountains. May the two great parallels be our guide to the grand lodge above. mouse poison. ", NAME = Ernesto P. Rivera 216 unfit to drive home. The Junior Steward's principle role is to assist the Senior Steward and the Senior Deacon in the preparation of the Candidates. identified himself, and pleaded his case. (GRANDLODGE) Seneca River #160 Grand Lodge of New York May we never condemn that in a brother which we would pardon in ourselves. (Must have been heavy ritual work that night). It's too far, the water is too deep, it's just totally beyond anybody's power. 18 th. We must work each and every day, and work hard, to create Harmony. got his tongue wrapped around his eye teeth awkwardly during the closing of "Go lock the door, pull the drapes.. and sit close as I'll only tell ya on it but once, and never a word again. understand then ? " lodge: University Heights #738, F. & A.M. y and then went over to the ball, Picked it up and exclaimed " It's a gimme !!! regard to the three great lights of masonry. May they always be desirous of contributing to the relief of their distressed Brethren and ever be destitute of the means. "Oh, simple," replied the woman. Response by a visitor 448, Lochee, Scotland hangman replies: "Calm down Brother and step off with your left foot! Province of West Lancashire "Oh yes" said Pat. And we go our separate way society instituted for the promotion of The The junior Warden's Place in the Lodge? Who supported us this year ", Sent by : Once again, he pulled over, got his license and registration ready and waited for the inevitable tap on the window. lodge: Duke of Richmond Lodge No 3143 The Post Master told him that he was a Mason, as was the man "I'm making great time," he thought. Theyll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. "Brethren, today's work in the temple put me in mind of the first time I ever met Brother Fred. "Well", our fellow said, "he might be experienced, but all he's doing is sitting there and barking! after the presenter had exchanged the usual greetings and enquired his name and occupation the brother declared his "chosen specialist subject" to be "the history of Scottish Freemasonry since the foundation of Grand Lodge" Went round the fourth part of a Shell love unconditionally, cry with joy when a child excels and cheer when friends get awards. May our conversation be such, that by it youth may find instruction, women Well the Senior Warden being a more expert workman looked at it . Console them in their sorrows, "Oh yes, he knows all the ritual, but when you make a mistake all he does is Masonic Wife answers unspoken questions about the facts and myths surrounding Freemasonry. Cecil M. (Hap) Howard, SS, Fulton Lodge #210, Fulton, KS, USA, -- I found this text on a cup in a lodge in Ireland: May we be more studious to correct our own faults, than to promulgate the errors of our Brethren. I could start reeling off his curriculum to show how worthy and honorable a Mason and a person he is. Proposer: "Well there are are WALKERS, TALKERS AND HOLY MEN" Every morning after a meeting the Master would dread Mrs. Tibbetts' approach because he knew what was coming"Oh, I see you had (the correct number) men at your meeting last night." You thought of everything; woman is truly amazing, yes, truly amazing.. the order of the WM that this lodge of Master MASONS be now closed*, it It is necessary to the young, comfortable to the old, serviceable to the poor, an ornament to the rich, an honor to the fortunate, and a support to the unfortunate. When The "rate of absorption": A. May Brotherly love continue and increase; till the time shall come, when as a band of Brothers, we shall all be united in the grand lodge above. "How can you say such a thing at a time like this? May every one, who belongs to the fraternity ardently cherish them in his heart, and may they be productive of good fruits in his life and conversation. It was in the old temple before the central heating was put it. pulled over, got his license and registration out and waited for the officer. His reply: "That's the only properly tiled room in the house. lodge: Baden Powell 505 As usual, the . "The man I killed was a Mason," explained the murderer, "the sheriff worthy brother. lodges. ASSISTANT OFFICER: In Freemasonry, the Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. How many of you are there? Enjoy our days boys . Did you use my idea of a cat? open the lodge if the ranking officer(s) is unable to attend the meeting. All regularly constituted lodges throughout the globe. Nothing., replied the owner. Let us toast After due thought, he said answers unspoken questions about the facts and myths surrounding Freemasonry. A Mason was having trouble with his ritual, and was telling a fellow mason in Let nothing come amiss; LODGE SET UP Prior to opening: o Bible is closed. To all who free-mason find constancy in love, and sincerity in friendship. And what about that outstanding purple bird with the iridescent green plumage, I asked. May we correct our own faults, before we publish those of our Brethren. A short time later there came across a large hole in the cloud and however she pretended to believe him, by asking how the ceremony had gone, and May the "So do I dear.. we swap them for a new one every year!! May discord, The Lord replied, Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason, and negotiate.. Thank you brothers for the tools and mental stimulation to assist in my duty to toast the ladies. Every brother who maintains a consistency in love, and sincerity in friendship. May universal benevolence be the plumb line of all our actions. name: John Goody around his neck. sit there and go, tut! Six pairs of hands! Junior Wardens Toast Happy to Meet, Sorry to Part, May all Front page, sports section and God bless the meat and God bless the stovies, Indeed, it shows that the man had been initiated into the Craft 86 years earlier but had never set his foot in the lodge since. grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Ireland, The Worshipful Master directed that the Lodge Deacons wear less aftershave in future, as the Candidate who had just been initiated that evening, when asked if he had felt comfortable during the ceremony,replied,"I was a bit worried for the first five or ten minutes, but the woman behind me was very helpful in keeping me from staggering! The woman said "yes, but only if you make me a mason". Two shells honed to a hollow-ground edge were fastened to its tip, inside a swivel mechanism. So our fellow took the animal. Awed by the regalia and apron of the Sovereign, the Tyler came into the Temple and said . ", name: jnchowdhary She is happy when hearing of a birth or a marriage. From the lady whom he worships, The Senior Warden is responsible for the Masonic mentoring of candidates. Contact Us. Thank you, it was very hopeful. The mason who The JD upon hearing these words from the visiting brother and the elaborate apron and jewels upon his chest, immediately closes the door, returns to his post and informs the WM: who hunted me down was a Mason, the Prosecutor who tried my case was a Steve, By the time the Lord made women, he was into his sixth day of working overtime. May all When doing so, please add the following: Article reprinted with permission of the author and https://freemasoninformation.com. He was duly tried and sentenced to hang He whizzed past Augusta and was now about an hour or so away. thought. Religion! the enforcement of specified laws or regulations. All wanted to know how he had accomplished pay for the change; - 2 to complain that "that's "Amazing," he said, "I didn't know anyone else had survived. At a very small country lodge, the Tyler was, by chance, a newly inititated apprentice. The heart And solace in his strife, for his crime. Being a chairitable Well, after a brief exchange, MWB P.C.S. Australia, Toast to Grand Lodge called him and explained his situation and asked if he could come to - 1 to order the brass plate and With WISDOM, STRENGTH and BEAUTY. brethren had turn up etc. United Grand Lodge of England, The victim is being brought to the gallow. No matter how long it takes at the panel beaters, it'll simply never be the same again!" To all ancient Masons, wherever dispersed and oppressed. One evening after a brother had been a guest at an installation, he had partaken of too . No Way! And thats the standard model? the Angel asked. to read out correspondence, he read a letter from the wife asking if the brother where He found this cavern contained a great many skeletons. hole she drove the green in two and was about to put for eagle. GRANDLODGE = Lodge Ashoka No: 93, Grand Lodge of India The Craft. ", Have you heard the story about that fellow who wants to go hunting? (GRANDLODGE) Grand Lodge F&AM of Ohio ", Sent by : "Well, I'll let you go this time but keep your speed down," the trooper replied. And darn it, she was right, but how did she know? How much is that bird I queried. And a Brother is full laden, May every Our Sisters. What do you think goes on in there? God bless the Catholics and God bless the strangers, "Whats that" enquired Pat. deformity of vice in other men, teach a ma-. Beyond that, no women were allowed in the building! grandlodge: United Grand Lodge of Victoria, A poor old Junior Deacon had been having a very bad night of ritual during a First Degree. Five minutes later, the police arrive. May each May peace, harmony and love predominate in all their meetings and happiness be the portion of every member, in his individual capacity. Toast to Visitors That particular bird is exceptional because the does the whole second part of the Third Degree and he sells for $1,000. The great Masonic virtues faith, hope and charity. He nearly jumped out of his pants !! Thank You who steer their course by the three great lights of masonry. The Candidate was handed a coin in his left hand by a brother mason and was ordered not to give it away or open his palm if he does there will be a severe penalty to be imposed or may not gain admission. She knows that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Trondheim, NORWAY. In other words, welcome to our home, most honored master Petruchio, as I can say, welcome to our home, Brother (Name). "Moses," replied the bird. and begin., name: Fraser Card Ill do better than that! said the Mason. actions as masons be properly squared. The Wardens perform the duties of the absent Master according to seniority, but the Junior cannot discharge the duties of the Senior Warden.
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